The feeling that you are not enough or doing enough for your children (or husband). That if only you could “get it together”, life would be easier and more pleasant.

This often comes from comparing yourself to other moms based on outward appearance, their well behaved children, or from not living up to your own expectations of what a mother should be. It can be a dangerous place to let your mind wander or stay and can lead to depression, anxiety, fear, and not parenting fully from the truth of the Word and the Holy Spirit that God has gifted you as your guide and counselor. It is a sneaky tactic of the enemy to keep us from relying on God, beating ourselves up as never being enough, and not getting to experience the joy of our families.

How can the lies of mom guilt be stopped before they go too far?

3 Necessary Steps to Identifying and Combating Mom Guilt

1 – Realize You are Not Enough

You, in your own strength and flesh, are not enough. You and your spouse together are not enough. You will never know all of the answers or how to parent perfectly. But this does not mean you are without hope or should just give up.

Instead of figuring it out on your own or with Google or Instagram, turn to the One who DOES know it all and DOES have all the answers.

When we can get to a place of recognizing our need for a Savior in ALL aspects of life,

we will find freedom of the burden of mom guilt.

Guilt is not something we are meant to carry when we are in Christ. If your burdens feel heavy, then you are likely carrying something you should not be carrying. Jesus said when we turn to Him and rely on Him, our burdens will be easy and our yokes light (Matthew 11:29-30).

So how does that actually happen? Can we really live a life with easy burdens and light yokes? Does this mean everything will work out perfectly?

2 – Live out of Your Identity in Christ

Absolutely not! And absolutely at the same time!! It all comes down to perspective. Maybe in your perspective nothing is perfect and the heavy burdens will never stop. But when we rely on the Lord and ask Him to help us, He can help change our perspective not only on our circumstances around us but who we are and how we approach issues as they come up.

The most freeing part of the Gospel that I think gets overlooked too often is who we now are in Christ. It is easy as a believer to spend an abundance of time focusing on your sin, especially as a mom!

But God didn’t redeem us to spend the entirety of our lives sulking in our sin and worrying we’re always screwing up.

God gave us new life in Him to have NEW LIFE – free of condemnation, guilt, and shame (Romans 8:1-2). He wants us to live freely from our identity in what Christ accomplished and wants us to show our number one opportunities to share the Gospel with – our children – what a life looks like when they believe.

I want to clarify that when we screw up, it is still important to confess your sin and repent before the Lord. This not only restores any distance you have placed between you and Him but also keeps us humble of who He is – a righteous, sovereign God – and who we are – saints ONLY through the sacrifice of Jesus. It keeps us in a place of praise and worship before the most worthy King.

It’s important to note that the point of God giving us new life and identity in Christ is for HIS glory not for us to look or feel good.

If you truly start to understand all that was accomplished through Christ’s sacrifice, it will bring you to your knees in worship, give you a desire to seek to live a holy life, and will convict you of your sins and lead you to repentance. You will realize how unworthy you are and how worthy God is. You will clearly see how undeserving you are of this precious gift and gratitude will flow from your life. Through all of this, your perspective will begin to change. It will stop being just about you and your comfortable life and more about God’s glory being shown and His will being accomplished. You will start to see things from the broader perspective of eternity instead which will change everything. You can find additional resources and more information on identity in Christ in these books.

3 – Trust God’s Grace is Enough

As we continue to walk in the flesh on this side of heaven, we will never do it all perfectly. That’s where God’s perfect grace continues to shine through every single day. In our weakness He is strong (2 Corinthians 12:9-10). In our failures He is sovereign, gracious, and good (Colossians 1:16-17, Romans 8:28).

Realizing that God loves your children more than you do, has good plans for them, and never gives up pursuing them can be a very freeing experience.

Of course, we should strive to parent well out of the Spirit’s leading and the truth of the Bible. But we will mess up. Maybe every now and then or maybe every day (that’s me).

But when you do mess up it does NOT mean you are ruining your kids’ lives or their chances for becoming believers. God’s bigger than our mistakes. He does not give up on you or your children. He will faithfully continue to pursue and love unconditionally because He cares more about you and your children’s hearts and souls than about temporary circumstances or you doing it all perfectly.

His will is not reliant on you and me. It is reliant on Him alone. While He allows us to be a part of His kingdom work, we also can’t screw it up. He will accomplish what He has set out to do one way or another. There is freedom coming to this place – accepting God’s unconditional love and grace and trusting that we can’t mess up His will.

As long as we’re seeking Him and spending time with Him, our desire will be to please Him, and He will start aligning our hearts with His.

Due to the battle that exists within our own flesh and the enemy that currently rules this earth, we will never do it perfectly. This is where we can lean into trusting His promises that what He begins He will bring to completion (Philippians 1:6). One way or another, His will will be accomplished.

We can trust Him. His love for us far exceeds what we could even imagine (Ephesians 3:19). So instead of sitting in guilt or shame for every screw up, come humbly before the Lord and receive the forgiveness He already laid out on the cross. You can trust from that place, He will meet you and surround you with His peace, love, grace, and reassurance that He is in control.

10 Bible Verses to Combat Mom Guilt

Meditate on these verses during your day to remind yourself of the redemption, grace, and sovereignty of the Lord.

“For this reason I kneel before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name. I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being,  so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love,  may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.”

Ephesians 3:14-21 NIV

“For freedom Christ has set us free; stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery.”

Galatians 5:1 ESV

“This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun! And all of this is a gift from God, who brought us back to himself through Christ. And God has given us this task of reconciling people to him.”

2 Corinthians 5:17-18 NLT

“For we are the circumcision, who worship by the Spirit of God and glory in Christ Jesus and put no confidence in the flesh—”

Philippians 3:3 ESV

“We were therefore buried with him through baptism into death in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead through the glory of the Father, we too may live a new life.”

Romans 6:4 NIV

“I pray that God, the source of hope, will fill you completely with joy and peace because you trust in him. Then you will overflow with confident hope through the power of the Holy Spirit.”

Romans 15:13 NLT

“I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
Wonderful are your works;
    my soul knows it very well.
My frame was not hidden from you,
when I was being made in secret,
    intricately woven in the depths of the earth.
Your eyes saw my unformed substance;
in your book were written, every one of them,
    the days that were formed for me,
    when as yet there was none of them.”

Psalm 139:14-16 ESV

Psalm 145:8-9 NIV

“for through him God created everything
    in the heavenly realms and on earth.
He made the things we can see
    and the things we can’t see—
such as thrones, kingdoms, rulers, and authorities in the unseen world.
    Everything was created through him and for him.
 He existed before anything else,
    and he holds all creation together.”

Colossians 1:16-17 NLT

“Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”

Jesus, Matthew 11:28-30 ESV

Grab a free printable of the verses so you can always have them on hand!

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Before beginning this challenge, I encourage you to chat with your spouse if this is something that he/she would be willing to do. It would be hard to do together if one party was not willing to share or take part. If your spouse is not willing to connect with you through prayer, then you can still take these 28 days of prayers and invest them into praying for your spouse in these areas. And never give up hope if your spouse isn’t super excited in the beginning. God’s always working and moving! Keep praying and stay faithful.

Why a Pray with your Spouse Challenge?

Instead of a pray for your spouse or marriage or family challenge, this is a pray with your spouse challenge for a reason. Having dedicated prayer time every night with my husband has completely transformed my marriage, and I know it will do the same for you if you are willing to put in the work and commit to it.

There was nothing really wrong with my marriage, just the usual little annoyances or getting frustrated with each other. Distance began to come between us due to my husband’s chronic illness and having two little kids under 3. We were arguing more, spending less intimate time together, and just weren’t as joyful as I felt like marriage could be. We would pray together every now and then, but I knew it wasn’t really enough. When we took the initiative to pray together every single day, things started to change. We grew closer, had more respect and patience for each other, and became more unified in our parenting. It made me fall even more in love with my husband.

In a marriage, you are a team, and there is nothing stronger than a unified team. The way to unify your marriage and family spiritually is through prayer and spending time with the Lord together. There’s no way around it! It builds trust and intimacy with your spouse as well realigns your perspective and your focus to God and His Kingdom. You can read more of my heart about praying with your spouse here.

Tips for the Pray with your Spouse Challenge

I’m not going to tell you exactly how you should pray with your spouse through this challenge, but I will give you some tips for how I think you will get the most out of it.

Tip 1 – Set aside the same time every day to pray together.

I understand this may not be feasible for everyone especially with work schedules and children. But if at all possible try to plan to pray together the same time every day. Try to set aside 15-30 minutes every day to do this together. If you feel rushed and like you’re just trying to fit it in, you won’t get as much benefit out of it. I know sometimes it may be rushed, and God can still use that time, but for the most part try to find a time of day that works well with both you and your spouse every day. Put it on your calendar if you have to.

For my husband and I this time is after the boys go to bed and before we go to sleep. After we put the boys down, we finish up dishes/straightening up then we head to bed and pray together first before doing anything else. After we pray we like to spend time together in the evenings doing a puzzle, watching a show, or just laying together chatting. This is my favorite time of day. I love my children and the time we get to spend together as a family, but there’s something really special when I get to connect to my husband in this way.

Tip 2 – Remove all distractions.

I understand this may not be possible every day if you’re traveling or have a sick child or something, but when you can try to remove all distractions from around you when you sit down to pray together. Put away phones, laptops, gaming devices, and turn off the tv and music during this time. If it’s too much of a distraction to have your phone laying beside you during this time take it to another room. I encourage you to use your physical Bible to read the verses instead of an app on your phone. If your phone is the only option you can read the verses then put your phone away in a different room if necessary.

Tip 3 – Don’t criticize or judge.

This time is to grow closer to your spouse not to try to “fix” them and their problems. The point of spending time in prayer with your spouse is for the Lord to become the Fixer of any of the problems within your marriage or within each of you. Try to come into this with an open mind and humble heart, willing to hear and receive any direction and healing from the Lord and how He uses your spouse to speak into your heart.

In some of the days, there are harder conversations that need to be had where you are confessing things or helping reveal areas of struggle for your spouse. Please try to approach these days prayerfully and humbly. Remember that everyone struggles, and we are all covered by the same grace of Jesus’ sacrifice. These conversations may be hard and may even cause some hurt in the beginning, but bringing these things to light are the beginning of healing.

If criticism or judgement is a struggle for you with your spouse, I really encourage you to spend time alone in prayer before praying with your spouse. That you would have a gracious, open, and humble heart willing to hear and receive what the Holy Spirit is speaking and sharing only out of a place of love and vulnerability.

If you just don’t think you can do this without being overly critical, then I encourage you to skip that step for the day. You can still read the verse and pray some together but don’t take that time to share together until you feel like you are in a place where you can receive and give in love. This is meant to bring unity to your marriage not division. If you stick with it, as time goes by your heart will soften towards your spouse and specific things. These kinds of things aren’t quick fixes, but it will take time and dedication as the Lord works to change you and your spouse.

Tip 4 – Take Turns to Pray.

This is part of praying together. It should not all rely on one of you to do the praying. I encourage you for this challenge to each pray every night. It will take more time, but this is where you’ll start to see your relationship deepen. If you’re not comfortable praying out loud with other people, I can’t imagine another person better to practice with than your spouse! This should be a time of grace and love, encouraging one another. It should grow and stretch you individually, together, and with the Lord.

Tip 5 – Have Realistic Expectations.

Don’t expect this to be a quick fix to any kind of struggle you may be having within your marriage or family. God can work that way, but usually He does not because He is working something bigger than the current situation. I don’t want you to think that just because you pray with your spouse for 28 days everything that bothered you about your spouse will be gone, and you won’t have any problems anymore. All of us are still battling our flesh daily so there will always be some kinds of friction when dealing with people. There’s no way to escape that this side of heaven.

But I do believe if you approach this with an open heart and mind, take it seriously, and complete it, you will find you are closer to your spouse and the Lord. You may find specific areas are completely healed. Or you may find other areas that God is now in the process of healing. But God will bless this time if you are faithful with it. You always come out changed when you enter in to the presence of the Lord. He will not let you down. Have faith in His timing and process. Every good thing takes dedication and work including marriage and your time with the Lord so don’t give up trying if things don’t get better right away.

Get the Pray with your Spouse Challenge

So are you ready to jump on this challenge?! It will take time and commitment, but I know God will bless this time spent together in His Word and presence. I pray that this challenge with not only strengthen your marriage and family but will also help you fall more in love with the Lord and strengthen your faith and trust in Him. If you participate in this challenge, I would love to hear about how it went for you – leave a comment or contact me here!

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Prayer and Children in the Bible

Prayer is simply a time where you are sitting at Jesus’ feet sharing your hopes, dreams, triumphs, and failures with Him. It is how we grow in our relationship with the Lord by spending time with Him just like how when we spend time with our spouse, children, or friends we are strengthening those relationships.

Jesus had some beautiful words to speak about spending time with children in Luke 18:15-17:

“People were also bringing babies to Jesus for him to place his hands on them. When the disciples saw this, they rebuked them. But Jesus called the children to him and said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. Truly I tell you, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it.”

Jesus loved spending time with children. Their childlike faith is used as an example of how we all should approach Jesus. This shows us that there is no one too young or too “childlike” to approach the feet of Jesus. He wants us all to come to Him just like little children.

1 – Be an Example

The most powerful way for a child to learn something is by watching someone else. The younger the kids the more likely they are watching everything you do and copying it in some form. I know my four year old copies things I say all the time!! It’s taught me to be cautious with my words as well as the significance of my role as a mom.

My husband and I both pray out loud in front of our children often, usually multiple times a day. We don’t try to “dumb” it down for our kids or make it sound a certain way. We just pray our hearts like we normally would, and when we talk to our boys about praying we make sure to emphasize that God wants to hear EVERYTHING that’s on our hearts and minds – the good, the bad, the silly, the ugly.

Make sure when you are praying out loud with your kids to include them in the prayer. Praying for the family unit or something specific about each child. When I pray for my boys before bed, I do it in each of their individual rooms when I’m laying them down. I make sure during my prayer I thank God for each boy and name specific things I love about them and ways I’d love to see God help them grow in.

An example of this would be:

“Lord, thank you so much for Sam and the joy he brings to our family. Thank you that you created him for specific purposes here on earth. I pray he would never lose the joy and excitement he has for life, and that he would never become jaded or deceived by the enemy and the world. Continue to strengthen his relationship with his brother, and help them love each other out of Your love and grace.”

Your kids are watching you. They watch how you react to situations and how you talk about/to God. Especially as little ones, they are soaking in everything they see and experience. Parents will definitely mess up plenty, and we can trust God’s grace will cover our mess ups. But we also know God uses us to teach and direct them through His word and Spirit. Our kids will be more likely to want to pray and learn to love spending time with God when they see the joy it brings their parents to do it.

2 – Give them Opportunities

Our children won’t recognize that they can pray on their own if you never give them an opportunity. They may think it’s just something grown ups do, not something they can do. I know growing up I didn’t realize the importance of me talking to God because I thought it was something only super spiritual grown up people did. But we can start nipping that lie right in the bud from the beginning with our kids. Teach them and show them that anyone can pray anytime.

It has helped me tons to have specific times during the day that I pray with the kids. I don’t confine myself to just praying during these specific times with the kids, but it’s a good base I try to do every day. It helps me to stay intentional with praying with them. Plus kids love a routine (as do I) so it’s an easy way to incorporate regular prayer time together into your already existing things you do.

Three times of day you can pray with your kids

1 – In the Car. Yes, every single time we get into the car to go somewhere we start our journey off with prayer. So this could happen multiple times of the day. My kids are used to it now and are usually so eager to pray that they fight over who will pray first. Usually in our car, every person in the car takes turn to pray, but I always give my boys a choice. Make sure you never force your kids to pray. This will result in a distorted view of what prayer is, and the joy it brings.

2 – At the table. No matter the meal, we always bless it! And usually my kids want to be a part of the fun. In fact, my oldest son who is four usually takes the initiative to start praying on his own. Again, I never force anyone to pray who doesn’t want to, but I make sure that everyone is invited to pray. And it doesn’t have to be limited to the food but anything on their hearts.

3 – Before bed. I briefly mentioned this before, but both my husband and I make sure we take individualized time to pray with each of our kids. This is a more intimate time just you and your child together. Most of the time my boys do not want to pray before bed so it’s just me/my husband. And that’s OK! We are setting an example of a good time to pray for rest and praise God for the wonderful day He gave us.

Are there times in your day that you think you could start implementing prayer time into? Some other times could be when your kids first wake up, when you sit down to homeschool or do homework, or praising God for the beauty of His creation when you’re outside playing. There is no limit to what we can praise God for, and how often we should be praying! I just encourage you to give your children a chance to be involved and pray their own hearts – no matter the time of day or what it is.

3 – Don’t Criticize

When you start giving your kids a chance to pray, you’re going to start hearing some interesting and fun prayers! It is so cool to me to watch my kids pray for things that are important to them. I can’t tell you how many dinosaurs have been prayed for in our house! If I were to correct them for praying for dinosaurs or anything else that’s important to them, it would start to make them feel like what it is important to them is not important to God.

Remember kids are kids. They have a very narrow worldview, and that’s OK! God grows it as they grow. Encouraging them to pray for things that matter to them now will teach them to always pray for things that matter to them as they grow. My youngest son is scared to go pee pee in the potty. Sometimes I pray with him that God will make him brave to go pee pee in the potty. The next thing I know, he’s taking the initiative to pray that for himself without any prompting. It’s something he realized he needed help with and prays for it. He still hasn’t gone pee pee in the potty, but God’s working beautiful things in his heart!

You can gently talk with them about things they could pray for or show them by praying for these things with them. They may not want to pray for those things, but it’s again being an example and will open up their minds and hearts to maybe praying for it in the future.

If the kids start being silly during prayer or seem to be getting off track or distracted by something else, you can gently remind them they are still praying by saying something like “are you done praying now?” This usually jogs their memory back into the prayer track. But if they are laughing and saying funny things while they pray, I encourage you not to correct or stop them. Usually what I do when this happens, is after everyone is done praying, I talk to them about how God created us with our sense of humors and loves it when we laugh and have fun with Him.

Making sure your kids feel comfortable praying no matter what they are feeling, helps them feel secure praying. They know that God isn’t judging them for saying something wrong or silly. He is simply delighting being with them. This is a great reminder for us as adults too! Prayer is a time of intimacy with the Lord, and it should be raw and real. God isn’t criticizing us for our prayers so we definitely shouldn’t do that to our children.

I pray this article not only encouraged you to spend more time in prayer with your kids, but also for you to spend more time in prayer for yourself. It is such a beautiful and intimate time with the Lord where you will find hope, freedom, and healing. One of the things I love the most about praying with my kids is listening to them praise the Lord for everything from the trees outside to how much they love their family. I encourage you to check out this post I wrote on prayer to shift your prayers from asking to praising. Praising God about everything realigns your your perspective on life and will help your kids do the same. We would all be a lot happier in life if we could maintain that Kingdom perspective He desires for us. It’s a great thing to teach our kids young!

What times of day are you going to take time to pray with your kids?

The post How to Help Your Kids Fall in Love with Prayer first appeared on This Momma Needs Grace.

God is faithful all the time and always gives us what we need when we need it. We actually have everything we need for faith and godliness through His Spirit that lives within us (2 Peter 1:3). We don’t have to spend our time begging God for things that are already ours. We just have to believe and receive these things. Spending time praising God instead of asking Him for things will realign your heart and mind to the Lord’s will and desire for your life as well as His unconditional love for you and faithfulness to you.

Why is it important to praise God?

Praising God puts Him back into His proper place in our lives – as King, Lord, and Mighty God. Although He is also our loving Father who loves to hear our requests, He is not there to just answer everything we ask the way we want. He is sovereign, good, and in control of every situation. Acknowledging that by praising Him puts your requests to Him in their proper place and reminds you that no matter what happens in those situations He is still good.

Praise is a chance to thank God for all that He’s done in your life. The more you praise Him, the more you’ll realize how much He’s done for you and continues to do for you. It helps refocus your mind on the Lord instead of your current circumstances. This will end up changing your perspective on how you see and encounter the world every day.

We see over and over again in the Bible where it emphasizes praise. Although the Bible does mention the importance of prayer and presenting your requests to God, it speaks even more about praising God in every circumstance.

“Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice. Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” – Philippians 4:4-7

This doesn’t say “praise God when you feel like or when things are going your way.” It says “Rejoice in the Lord ALWAYS”! And as we see as we read on, the reward for praying with thanksgiving in all things is peace that surpasses all understanding and guards our hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.

Peace, a guarded mind, intimacy with the Lord, a changed perspective, and joy are all byproducts of praise. It can change your entire life. You can read more about how praise can change your perspective on everything here.

Why is it easier to make requests than praise?

But we know this idea to praise God doesn’t always come easily. It never has. It is an area satan loves to attack because he is the one that wants praise. That’s why he was cast out of heaven to begin with. He thought was he was something very special and beautiful, and that he deserved the glory and honor that belonged to God only (Ezekiel 28:11-19).

Try to remember that satan does not like it when you praise God. He will do what he can to try to redirect your thoughts and fill your head with lies. Often times when something we are walking through is difficult, we begin to believe that God is not good. This is to satan’s delight. He wants us to doubt God’s goodness in even the smallest things so that we will start doubting God in the biggest things.

Being aware that this is an area satan wants victory in your life can help you combat it effectively by consciously choosing to not entertain these lies. You can stop the lies in their tracks by doing exactly what satan doesn’t want you to do – praising God in every situation.

Examples of Prayers to Praise God in the Bible

In the Bible you will see examples of people going through hard or tempting times and choosing not to praise or seek God. There is always unhappiness and things continue to get worse for them, and God uses discipline and tries to draw them back to Himself. Sometimes the person will return to the Lord, and He always receives them with open and willing arms because first and foremost He loves and wants the best for all of us. But if the person does not repent, he will never experience God’s true peace and love that He has available to him.

But we also see some examples of people in the Bible who are in challenging times and choose to praise God. And although things may not immediately get better, they get to experience God’s love and peace during the challenging time. And they can continue to trust in the goodness in God because they know He is working out all things for their good and His glory (Romans 8:28).

Job

The book of Job is full of temptation and difficult circumstances as God allows satan control over all Job has. He takes all his land and livestock, and he kills his children. Job’s response was one of grief but also praise:

“Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked shall I return. The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord.” – Job 1:21

Satan doesn’t stop there. He then curses him with sickness, and even his wife encourages Job to curse God but he does not. His friends come and try to tempt him to doubt God or come to repentance before God, but Job continued to stand strong that God was good and that he had not done anything against the Lord.

Through it all, Job may have questioned God as to why all of this was happening, but He never doubted God’s goodness. And at the end, God expressed his anger against his three friends that they not only doubted Him but they were encouraging Job to doubt and curse Him. But God praised Job for his faithfulness to Him and trust in Him.

Job 42:10 says, “And the Lord restored the fortunes of Job, when he had prayed for his friends. And the Lord gave Job twice as much as he had before.” Job’s faithfulness and praise to the Lord resulted in not only His endurance during the hardship but something better at the end of it all. We can trust God in even the hardest situations to be working things for good.

Mary, mother of Jesus

As a woman and mother, it is easy for me to identify how difficult it would have been for Mary to walk in the shame of a teenage, unplanned pregnancy without your fiance. But Mary did not hesitate to accept the Lord’s will when the angel who came to her and told her what was to happen. She said in Luke 1:38:

“Behold, I am the servant of the Lord; let it be to me according to your word.”

I’m sure she must have been terrified and maybe even full of doubt and confusion as to what was happening. So she went to visit her cousin Elizabeth for comfort and confirmation. When she walked in and Elizabeth confirmed what the angel had already told her, she exclaimed in praise to the Lord:

“My soul magnifies the Lord, and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior, for he has looked on the humble estate of his servant. For behold, from now on all generations will call me blessed; for he who is mighty has done great things for me, and holy is his name.” – Luke 1:47-49

Praising God didn’t change the situation. She was still going to have to walk through a lonely and shameful life of premarital pregnancy. But she praised God and kept her eyes on Him because she knew the result was going to be worth it. I know we don’t always get angels directly delivering us news, but we can trust that God is still one who loves and works things out for our good.

Steps to turn your Requests to Prayers to Praise God

1 – Change Your Mindset

Instead of looking at things as what needs to change, try to see what God is doing in and through them. Praying for the Holy Spirit to reveal the good in even the worst situations can help you see things differently. It can be a simple thing to change the way you pray from asking to praising. Instead of “God please help me” make it “God thank you for.”

2 – Ask the Holy Spirit to Direct Your Prayers

The Holy Spirit is God living inside of us. He knows what needs to happen in every circumstance. Ask the Holy Spirit for wisdom and guidance when praying for a situation. And if you don’t know what to pray, the Holy Spirit is directly interceding on behalf of us (Romans 8:26-27).

3 – Stay in the Word

God’s Word is full of His promises. Instead of looking at and focusing on your problems, look at God’s Word and see all that He has done for you. The more you’re in the Word, the more you will be reminded of God’s goodness and sovereignty. Time and time again we see situations in the Bible that seem bad at the moment, but God is using for good. If you keep reading these truths, you will start believing they are true for you too.

4 – Remember What God has Already Done

Look back and see God’s faithfulness in your life. You can look at difficult situations from your past and see how God came through and brought good out of the bad. No one can take away your testimony of God’s goodness in your own life. Remind yourself of it often, and you will see God hasn’t forgotten or given you up on you now.

5 – Write out Your Prayers

A good way to really organize your thoughts and help focus your prayer life is by writing down your prayers. You don’t have to do it all the time, but every now and then it can be really good at focusing your prayers into praises. Another great way to remember God’s goodness is to at least keep an ongoing list of prayers and answers. Write down your request and when you see the answer write it next to the request. You will really start to see how God is working and moving in your life through this.

Example Requests turned to Prayers to Praise God

So let’s look a couple of practical examples on how you can turn your simple everyday requests into prayers to praise God.

1 – When praying for self-control

As a request: “God, please help me not eat that piece of chocolate cake.”

As a praise: “God, thank you for giving me self-control to not eat the chocolate cake because you know it is not best for me.”

2 – When praying for sickness

As a request: “God, please take away my pain and heal me.”

As a praise: “God, thank you for all the healing you have done throughout my life. I praise you for taking care of me and always knowing what is best. Thank you that you will continue to use healing in my life.”

3 – When praying for forgiveness from being hurt by a person

As a request: “God, please help me forgive Cathy for talking bad about me behind my back.”

As a praise: “God, thank you for your forgiveness that you shower on me and that flows out of me and into others. Thank you that you give me the ability to forgive so that a root of bitterness does not take hold in my heart. Thank you that you give me all I need to fight the spiritual battles that rage around me because I know I am not fighting flesh and blood but spiritual forces of darkness.”

4 – When praying for God’s will in a certain situation

As a request: “God, please reveal your will to me so that I don’t miss out on what you want me to do in this situation.”

As a praise: “God, thank you that you have given me the mind of Christ. Thank you for your Holy Spirit that lives inside me and directs my steps. Thank you that no matter what decision I make, you are with me, never leaving me.”

5 – When praying for your kids to behave

As a request: “God, please help my kids listen to me and learn how to do what is right.”

As a praise: “God, thank you for giving me the gift of my children. Thank you that you love them more than I do and are working in their hearts and lives even now. Thank you that you give me patience, grace, and wise discipline through your Holy Spirit.”

Do you see the difference? You can take any simple request and turn it into a phrase of praise. This changes your attitude in any situation and always keeps God as Lord and the one who truly is in control.

What I like to do when I pray is start every request with a praise. I praise then ask for things. Then when I do request things, I ask in a simpler more submissive way trusting that God is truly good and sovereign over every situation.

How do you keep your mind focused on the goodness of God?

The post How to Turn Your Requests to Prayers to Praise God first appeared on This Momma Needs Grace.

It wasn’t until I started to learn about who God was, and His incredible love for me that I started to understand that there was more to this Christian life than I thought possible. I wasn’t “serving” a harsh Father, but I was adopted into a new spiritual family that not only showered me with grace and love but allowed me to have my inheritance now! If identity in Christ is a new concept for you, I encourage you to read this post or look at these resources for more information.

What are declarations about identity in Christ?

A declaration is defined as a formal or explicit statement or announcement. A declaration about identity in Christ is a truth about who you are in Christ that you are declaring over yourself and other believers. It is something you can do alone or with a group. It is speaking a truth out loud whether you believe it in the moment or not.

The Bible is full of declarations of who you are as a believer. It is also full of declarations about who God is. Learning both of these truths will transform your Christian walk from shame to joy and guilt to freedom. You can’t fully believe who you are in Christ until you start believing God is who He says He is.

Why do we need to do declarations?

Declarations are an important exercise to do as believers, especially speaking them out loud. It releases light and truth into the atmosphere that we walk in. It reminds us who we are in Christ and the victory we have to live in. It helps retrain our thinking to stand on the truth and not believe the lies of the enemy.

It takes time to retrain our thoughts to believe some of these truths from the identity in Christ list. It goes against maybe what you were taught to believe growing up or what you’ve seen and experienced from other believers. It goes against what the enemy is trying to get you to believe about yourself. So it is important to regularly speak these truths over yourself over and over again until you believe they are true. And then some more to speak it out so the enemy knows you believe they are true. Once you start believing and living these truths, you will experience more freedom and joy than you ever thought possible!!

Your Identity in Christ List

The following identity in Christ list will help point you to who you are now that you are a believer. Each truth is back up by Scripture. You can print out the printable list or write out your own copy to have these truths handy every day. Keep them close and read them often and see how God begins transforming your mind and life!

1. I am a new creation. 2 Corinthians 5:17
2. I am a child of God. John 1:12
3. I am a co-heir in Christ’s inheritance. Romans 8:17, Galatians 4:6-7
4. I am a citizen of heaven and seated there right now. Philippians 3:20, Ephesians 2:6
5. I am dearly and unconditionally loved. Romans 8:38-39
6. I am the salt and light of the world. Matthew 5:13-14
7. God will provide for all of my needs. Matthew 6:25-33
8. I am forgiven and free from the guilt of sin. 2 Corinthians 5:18-19, Colossians 2:13-15, Hebrews 9:26
9. I am a saint. Hebrews 10:10, Ephesians 1:1
10. I am a temple of the Holy Spirit. 1 Corinthians 3:16, 6:19-20
11. I am a stranger in this world. 1 Peter 2:11
12. The enemy cannot hurt me. 1 John 5:18
13. I am righteous and holy. 2 Corinthians 5:21, Ephesians 4:24
14. I am hidden in God with Christ. Colossians 3:3
15. I am a member of Christ’s body with specific gifts and purposes. Ephesians 2:10, 1 Corinthians 12:4-11
16. I was knit together in my mother’s womb for specific Kingdom purposes. Psalm 139:13-16
17. I walk in victory. 1 John 5:4
18. I am chosen. John 15:16, Colossians 3:12, 1 Thessalonians 1:4, 1 Peter 2:9-10
19. I have everything I need for life and godliness. 2 Peter 1:3-4
20. I am part of God’s family. Ephesians 2:19
21. I am a daughter/son of light and darkness cannot overtake me. 1 Thessalonians 5:5
22. I am an enemy of the devil. 1 Peter 5:8
23. I have purpose while I am still on earth, and God does not waste a day of my life. Psalm 139:16, Psalm 138:8, Philippians 1:6
24. God is working all things for my good and His glory. Romans 8:28
25. I do not battle flesh and blood but evil forces of darkness and are equipped to fight and win the battle. Ephesians 6:10-18
26. I am Christ’s friend. John 15:15
27. I have a heavenly calling. Hebrews 3:1
28. I share Christ’s life. Hebrews 3:14
29. I am a living stone used to build a spiritual house. 1 Peter 2:4-5
30. I have the mind of Christ and reflect Him. 1 John 3:2, 1 Corinthians 2:16

How to use your Identity in Christ List

Take this copy of the list or make your own copy or notecards to keep around your house. Keep it in places that you will see it often. I recommend reading it out loud when you wake up every day as a way to set your mind right first thing. Also when you are struggling with believing something, maybe even a specific truth from this list, have it handy to read out loud the truths to fight the lie and struggle in the moment. It would also be good to read the Scriptures out loud when you are struggling in any specific area.

This may seem tedious and repetitive, but that is how retraining your brain works. It takes time and persistence. Lies that you have believed since childhood or that are deeply ingrained from a traumatic experience will take time to rewire to these truths. But the more you do it, the easier it becomes – not to just read them out loud but to actually start believing them. It may be good to tackle some of the ones that are hard for you to believe one at a time, conquering one truth before moving onto another.

God will use this practice to bring freedom, joy, and new life to you. He is faithful and good wanting you to not just live but thrive in your life in Him. He loves you more than you could ever understand and wants you to live in this free gift of grace and mercy He’s given you. Prayerfully seek Him on these things and cling to Him when you doubt or worry. He will bring healing and restoration to your life through His sacrifice.

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The post 30 Declarations of Your Identity in Christ (plus Free Identity in Christ List Printable) first appeared on This Momma Needs Grace.

The key to this piece of marriage advice is that it’s not about us at all. It’s not about communicating a certain way or spending “X” amount of time together everyday. While those things are important, I think they are secondary changes that will come naturally or more easily once you start doing this one thing every day. And that thing is praying with your spouse every single day.

Note: If you are in any kind of unhealthy abusive relationship (physical, spiritual, or emotional) then I encourage you to first seek professional help from a counselor or pastor.

This post contains affiliate links, which means I receive a small commission, at no extra cost to you, if you make a purchase using this link. Please see my disclosure for more details.

Why is Praying Important Marriage Advice for Christians?

As believers when we enter in the union of marriage, it’s not just between a man and a woman. It is between man, woman, and God. So why would we not include God in the day to day with our spouse? Your individual relationship with God is important because it is unique and yours, but your relationship with your husband and God is also important because it realigns your marriage to what it’s supposed to be all about.

The thing I do not understand is how little this is talked about. I don’t remember this piece of advice coming up during premarital counseling, advice from friends or family, or even talked about much in the church. I think this is probably because Satan does not want this to happen. He will always come up with excuses and reasons why this would not work for you and your spouse. His goal is to destroy these God centered relationships and families so he’s always prowling around seeking to kill and destroy (1 Peter 5:8, John 10:10).

Focusing on Prayer is the First Step to Fixing Other Problems

There is a lot of advice out there for marriage. How to fight, how to make up, how to encourage each other, how to show each other you love the other person. And it is all good. I do not want to negate this advice because it can and will be beneficial to marriage. But I think one of the best places to start is at the foot of the Throne – together.

When Kevin and I decided to start praying together, it took a couple weeks for it to become more normal and natural. We of course prayed separately and prayed for and encouraged each other, but something started to change as we started to make that time to pray together. Now I can’t go to sleep if we haven’t prayed together before bed. It is something I crave and need to be able to sleep peacefully.

We still have our problems like any couple! We are still living and battling the flesh, and unfortunately it wins out more than I’d like. But even if one of us is mad, we still pray together. It may be short and sweet or maybe just one person prays instead of both, but just a few minutes of prayer can soften my hardened heart and break my stubborn pride.

Coming together and bringing your pain, problems, and disappointments to the foot of the cross can break communication barriers, pride, and uncertainty. It can remind and realign your marriage to what it is meant to be – a reflection of the Gospel.

God’s Design for Marriage – a Reflection of the Gospel

Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body. “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband. – Ephesians 5:25-33

When you look at your marriage, do you see the Gospel?

It’s easy to read the above verses and put all the burden on the husband to love the wife perfectly the way Christ loves the church. While the husband may carry more of a load as our leader, it is not necessary that he feels this burden alone. As wives we are called to submit to and respect our husbands. When you are being submissive and respectful, how much easier is it to love you?

We should not place unrealistic expectations on our husbands to love us perfectly because they are also still battling in the flesh. We were created to be our husband’s helpmate (Genesis 2:18). How are we helping point our husbands back to Christ so that he can faithfully and obediently lead, serve, and love our families?

Christ loves His church (us) perfectly all the time. But we don’t get to experience the full extent of that love if we are not submitting and respecting the Lord. It is the same with our relationship with our husbands except that our husbands can’t love us perfectly because they are still in the flesh. We don’t get to experience the full extent of our husband’s love for us if we are in a battle against them all the time.

When you pray together you can start seeing your spouse for the saint that they are in Christ and encourage and support them in the unique role God has given them for marriage. You are also reminded of your own imperfections especially within the marriage relationship. It can open up many wonderful conversations and healing opportunities.

The very best book I have ever read about marriage reflecting the Gospel is You and Me by Francis Chan. If you have not read it yet, please check it out. My husband and I read each chapter individually then would chat about what we read. They also have a workbook you can do individually or together with your spouse.

Why don’t we all strive to love our spouses the way that Christ loves us? Not only will it bring health to your marriage, it will also be a way in which your life will beautifully display the Gospel to non-believers.

Tips for How to Pray Together

You may be thinking you have no idea where to get started to pray with your spouse. That’s OK!! It is not as hard and complicated as you may feel it should be. Something as simple as a few minutes is a great place to start.

1 – Pick a time to do it and stick to it

What worked best for me and my husband was to pray right before bed. We always have gotten in bed at the same time so it worked out perfectly for us to pray together as soon as we got into bed before watching bedtime tv or reading. Maybe you and your husband go to bed at different times, that’s ok!

Think through your day. What is one time you could both set aside to pray together?

Maybe it’s first thing in the morning because you wake up at the same time. Or maybe it’s at a meal time where you could take 5 minutes together before enjoying your meal. I do encourage it to be a time alone with just you and your husband. No children or other distractions.

2 – Both of you take a turn

I highly encourage this not be a one sided prayer, meaning just you or your husband. Every night, my husband starts off the prayer and I finish it off. Some nights when one of us is sick (or angry) just one of us will pray. But this is the exception not the rule.

It may not be comfortable for you to pray out loud in front of anyone, even your husband. Pray through this fear and be bold! Just pray how you would pray normally but out loud. The more you do it, the more comfortable it will become.

3 – Pray what’s on your heart

Don’t worry about saying the “right things” or praying a certain way, that’s not what this is about. It’s about you being open and vulnerable with your spouse and the Lord. Pray what’s on your heart no matter how silly it may sound. That’s the only way you’ll start to experience more intimacy.

God doesn’t expect perfection, and I’m sure neither does your husband. God wants your heart, all of you. He wants to hear everything you have to say even if it’s anger or selfishness. Through being open and expressing all your feelings and thoughts, God will start to work on those areas to bring healing, and once your spouse knows these areas of struggle they can start encouraging you in them.

4 – Don’t worry about how long you pray for

This is not about big long expansive prayers. Start out small. If you each only have one minute of stuff to pray, that’s ok. It’s starting somewhere. The more you do it, the more comfortable you get, and the longer it will become. You’re not trying to set any kind of records or anything.

This is a time for you, your husband, and the Lord to connect. It’s not for any other purpose. Use this time how you see fit would benefit your marriage and your connection with the Lord most wisely.

What if your Husband will not Participate?

Do not give up. It’s ok if your husband doesn’t jump on board the first time you mention it. Some people are very private or not in a place spiritually where they feel like they can do it. If your husband will not get upset, some gentle encouragement may help nudge him in the right direction. This is not something to condemn your husband about or pressure him into doing. If you are both not equally on board, you will not see fruit.

If your husband is just dead set against it, start praying for it to happen. Over time God will work on softening his heart and opening him up to the opportunity. I believe this is something God delights in and desires to see happen in every marriage. It may take some time, but don’t give up on God. Stay faithful in prayer, and He will hear and answer.

If your husband is not a believer, then the same is true. Pray for him. Stay faithful in prayer for him. Don’t doubt God’s goodness and love for your husband and family. God loves your husband more than you ever could so He is working and moving whether you can see it or not. Prayerfully serve and encourage your husband in the Lord, and allow God to work and move within him.

Remember you cannot change any person, only God can. So don’t get frustrated with that person if they don’t do things according to your expectations. God is working something through both of you in the waiting and uncertainty.

Conclusion

The truth of the matter is praying can strengthen and encourage your marriage if you will take the intentional time every day to do it together. But this is not a magic pill that will fix everything instantly. It does bring your marriage back into the design it was supposed to be – with God involved everyday.

I pray that you can find hope, encouragement, and healing through beginning to pray with your spouse everyday.

What is your one piece of marriage advice that has transformed your marriage?

The post One Piece of Transformational Marriage Advice for Christians first appeared on This Momma Needs Grace.

I find myself feeling guilty or beating myself up for not being able to make it happen. The problem I discovered years ago though were that these resolutions were not only self seeking, but I was trying to accomplish them in my own strength. Although it would be good for me to be healthier for my family, my main heart motivation was wanting my body to look better, and I knew the right amount of will power could do that. I decided these typical kind of New Years Resolutions weren’t for me.

This post contains affiliate links, which means I receive a small commission, at no extra cost to you, if you make a purchase using this link. Please see my disclosure for more details.

What Kind of New Years Resolutions are Worth the Time?

When I gave up New Years Resolutions, it was mainly so I would not spend so much time focusing on myself, including feeling sorry for myself. Everything about it, even the beating myself up for not following through, was self focused. It was not a healthy cycle. If you are one of those people that has amazing follow through and self discipline, you are awesome! I am in awe of the determination and hard work that you can put in to better yourself and your family. It’s just not me.

This year I decided to do something different. I want to make easy, small changes that aren’t about my own dedication and hard work in my flesh but about the Holy Spirit working and changing me. These are seven small things you can do with me that will slowly but definitely bring you into a deeper relationship with God and allow the Holy Spirit to change you from the inside out.

1 – Begin and End Every Day Praising God

A few years ago I was sick of always feeling negative about everything, and I really sought the Lord on it. I had prayed about it often, but I always gave into worry and fear and let it control my life. But this time I was determined to not fall back into the same patterns of negative thinking. God revealed to me through my persistent prayers that Joy was unlocked from Praise. I should have known and already been doing this, but my thoughts and flesh were clouded and programmed with lies that God really wasn’t who He said He was – at least not for me.

Once I started consciously taking time every day to praise God, things slowly started changing. My brain and flesh started to become rewired to think in terms of God’s goodness instead of what I was missing or what could happen. I could focus on enjoying the moment instead of dreading the past. It wasn’t easy sometimes and took time, but eventually I began to see the world through a new lens. You can read more about how this one act changed my perspective on everything (and can change yours too!) here.

My challenge to you is to take the time to praise God first thing when you wake and last thing before you go to sleep. It may be just one thing in the morning and one thing at night because that’s all you can muster right now. Or it may be a laundry list. Either way it is an easy step you can take every day to start aligning yourself to the Truth and unlock true Joy!

2 – Keep a Bible Handy and Open

I wrote a little about this in my 7 Tips to Stay Consistent in God’s Word for Busy Moms post. But it can really be beneficial for every one of us!

There are constant distractions every where. Technology is king and demands our attention most of our waking hours. One “trick” I found that helped me stay more consistent in God’s Word was having Bibles open and everywhere!

Wherever you spend a good amount of time in your house, have a Bible there. Maybe you’re in the living room a lot or your office or kitchen – all of those places are easy to stash an extra Bible. When it’s there and open, it’s easy to make the choice to pick up reading where you left off. It’s still a choice you have to make rather than doing something else, but the more you do it the more natural it becomes.

3 – Choose Grace over Guilt

This is a HUGE thing for me. I am the queen of being burdened with the weight of my own sins and mistakes. Even when I consciously know that I am forgiven by God, it’s like I can’t forgive myself. If I mess up either on purpose or on accident, my mind will dwell there for weeks.

I grew up believing a lie that I had to be perfect for God to love me. I strived out of my own strength and always felt guilty, helpless, and unsure how God felt about me. I grew up in a Christian home and going to church, but somehow my mind had gotten twisted from the truth. In college, I finally discovered God’s true grace and started learning about His love for me no matter what.

When I finally started truly believing God is who He says is, I could learn about how He sees me and how I should see myself. God doesn’t want us to live in a defeated, guilty ball all the time. He wants us to live in our free identities in Christ receiving His forgiveness, grace, and mercy for the past, present, and future. He desires us to confidently know who we are in Christ so we can boldly share and represent Him with our lives.

4 – Replace Lies you Believe with Truths

We all have lies we believe as truths. Whether we recognize them or not they are there. Some may have been there since we were very young and some may be more recent. Some may be very easy to identify while others may be so deeply rooted we need others to help us bring them to light.

I encourage you to take time to identify at least one lie you are believing a month. That’s it, just one a month. Once you prayerfully identify it, start digging through Scripture to figure out the truth about that lie. Then create notecards or a space in your journal to write down the truth with Scripture. Read that truth every morning before getting out of bed and every night before turning off the light and going to sleep for the entire month.

Then when the next month comes, you can either just do a new one or add on if you are still struggling with the previous month’s lie. This will retrain your thinking to no longer believe the lie, and you will start experiencing freedom from it. Depending on how deeply rooted the lie is will determine how long it will take for freedom to come.

An example could go like this: The lie I believe is “My words don’t matter.” The truth and Scripture(s) I would write down would be: “I have the mind of Christ, and He gives me the right words at the right time to accomplish His purposes. 1 Corinthians 2:16; John 14:26; Luke 12:12; Luke 21:14-15; Ephesians 2:10.”

5 – Connect with an Encouraging Community

For years we didn’t attend our church in person. Even before the pandemic there were a million excuses for why we didn’t go. We had for awhile felt like we didn’t fit in and tried different small groups but never found a good fit. It wasn’t until we moved cities for my husband’s job that we found a church where we truly felt free to be ourselves.

We quickly fell in love with the people and got involved with small groups. It was the best decision we could have made after years of feeling unwanted and like outcasts in the church.

Having a community of people that can pray for and encourage you is so important. Sometimes it just takes finding the right church/group to find the right fit so don’t give up! Keep looking and praying. God is faithful and will give you what you need at the right time.

6 – Get an Accountability Partner

Do you have a friend who is a believer and you feel like you can tell anything to without fear of judgement or condemnation? This is who your accountability partner should be. Someone who can lovingly draw you back to the Cross without making you feel guilty or ashamed if you don’t follow through or mess up.

The goal of an accountability partner in my mind is someone who deepens your relationship with Christ just through regular conversation. It doesn’t need to be a forced thing. I have a friend who I know if I talk to I will always get off the phone feeling encouraged and challenged in the best way.

You can have accountability about something specific or just have a friend you call to encourage each other in the Lord. These friendships are so valuable and worth the time. If you don’t already have someone like this in your life, start praying for God to provide you with one. You would be amazed how He will bless you even in the most unexpected ways.

7 – If You’re Married, Pray with your Spouse Every Day

I can’t emphasize this one enough. This is game changing for your marriage. When you got married, you entered into a union with not only your husband but also God. So why would we not include God in our relationships with our spouses?

Although my husband and I have only been married 5 years, we have been through a lot. The thing that brought us more intimacy and love than anything else is when we made the decision to start praying together every night. It took a couple of weeks to get into the habit, but now I can’t go to sleep without it.

This will deepen your relationship with your spouse and with God. You can spend as much or as little time praying together, but we like to each take a turn each night and pray for what’s on our hearts. It could be for our kids, friends and family, needs, wants, and each other. It doesn’t have to be perfect or a big long production. It can just be a short and sweet way to encourage each other.

Keep in mind that Satan is out to destroy God-fearing marriages and families. Praying together creates a united front against these attacks. It is possibly the most valuable thing you can do for your family.

Wrap It Up

New Years Resolutions can be a positive or negative thing. Keeping the Holy Spirit involved will give you a better chance of seeing success. I encourage you to choose one or do all 7 of these simple to implement resolutions to make 2022 a year where you grow closer to the Lord.

Praise the Lord every morning and night, keep a Bible open and handy, choose Grace over guilt, replace lies with truths, connect with an encouraging community, get an accountability partner, and pray with your spouse. That’s it! Simple things that don’t take more than a few minutes a day that will bring you closer to God if you stick with them.

Always remember though, that even if you start all of them and don’t follow through with a single one – you are still loved, cherished, and seen as whole, forgiven, and free in Christ. Your worth is not found in any of these things. It’s only found in Christ’s precious gift of life He has so freely given, and we get to freely receive.

If you are into organizing things like this and are still in need of a planner/calendar for 2022, check out these adorable ones available through DaySpring! You can find simple ones or more in depth ones. There is something for everyone.

So what about you? Do you usually follow through with your New Years Resolutions?

The post 7 Simple New Years Resolutions that Draw you Closer to God first appeared on This Momma Needs Grace.

I want to share today something that’s near and dear to me and my friend Jes’s hearts. We are both married to educators, who are very gifted at their jobs. But both of our husbands have noticed a spiritual attack raging within their respective school systems. They don’t work at the same school or even within the same school system, and both have seen and experienced things this year that they never would have in years past. Satan has gotten his hold of the unbelieving students and teachers within the school system and is wrecking havoc.

I have split up this post into two sections. One written by my friend Jes and one written by me. Join us in fighting for and with our husbands and every believer in the school system through prayer.

Jes’s Heart for the Front Line Heroes

“Arise and shine, for your light has come, and the glory of the Lord has risen upon you.” Isaiah 60:1

Before I got married to an educator and had three small children, I spent time serving as a teacher and missionary in China. Someone may say that the “front lines of faith” are in these countries where Christianity is a minority. However, if someone in those places were to ask me who the “front line workers in the faith” are in America, my answer would be simple – Christian Educators and students in the Public schools.

Over the past couple of years we have seen that the “front line workers of the faith” in America have been highlighted to us all. Amongst the educators are healthcare workers, politicians, and military to name only a few. 

The Attack on our Schools

Psalm 10:4 says, “The wicked in his proud countenance does not seek God, God is in none of his thoughts.”  As you continue on, Psalm 10:8-10 describes more of the approach and character of the wicked. ”He sits in the lurking places of the villages; in the secret places he murders the innocent; His eyes are secretly fixed on the helpless. He lies in wait secretly, as a lion in his den; He lies in wait to catch the poor; He catches the poor when he draws him into his net. So he crouches, he lies low, that the helpless may fall by his strength.”

David in this Psalm then moves to the power and promise of the Lord, “But YOU have seen it, for You observe trouble and grief, to repay it by Your hand. The helpless commits himself to You; You are the helper of the fatherless. Break the arm of the wicked and the evil man.” 

Jesus bore witness to the Father’s heart regarding children:

• “Let the little children come to Me. Do not hinder them. The Kingdom of Heaven belongs to such as these.” – Matthew 19:14
• “Start off children in the way they should go and they will not turn from it.” – Proverbs 22:6

As a wife of a teacher, I have witnessed the oppression that has come upon our school systems, teachers, and students. Violence, sexual immorality, greed, lying, stealing, disrespect, hatred, fits of anger, apathy, fear, depression, oppression, addiction, and defiance have been the characteristics that describe a day in the walls of many public schools. 

Join Us in Praying for our Front Line Heroes

As I witness many teachers who have the Spirit of God living in them cry out  in this time, I asked God, how can we (The church) help them? The answer was simple. Committed and united prayer. 

Any persecuted believer would say the same thing, “Prayer.” Our Educators, and Director of Education authorities, bus drivers, students and parents need prayer. We can never underestimate the humble and faith-filled approach of prayer. Oh how it pleases God!

Join me every Monday at 8 AM to pray for these people who are serving and attending the “front lines of faith” each day. We will gather together as a family of Christ to pray for our Education system including the children who the Lord loves.

God’s Promise

Psalm 10 ends with a promise that we can hold on to, “Lord you have heard the desires of the humble; You will prepare their heart; You will cause Your ear to hear, To do just to the fatherless and the oppressed, That the man of the earth may oppress no more.” 

In Luke 1 The angel of the Lord came to John the Baptists father (Zechariah) and told him that John the Baptist would come in the spirit of Elijah, that He would be filled with Holy Spirit and he would turn their hearts. Look at how their hearts would turn: 

“He will also be filled with the Holy Spirit, even from his mother’s womb. And he will turn many of the children of Israel to the Lord their God. He will also go before Him in the spirit and power of Elijah, ‘to turn the hearts of the fathers to the children,’ and the disobedient to the wisdom of the just, to make ready a people prepared for the Lord.” Luke 1:15-17

1. Children’s hearts would be turned to God.
2. Fathers hearts would turn to their children.
3. Hearts of disobedience would turn to the wisdom of the just.

May this mission continue within the walls of our homes and also our schools. 

A Prayer for our Educators

Father, we trust your Word that says to be in Christ is to be free. Even when we are in a circumstances that may be oppressive, we are not overcome. The weapon of oppression shall not prosper against your people, including the teachers that boldly show up every day to love and teach these children. We pray that they will walk in the freedom and light given to them by the power of the Living God who lives in them. We thank you Lord that you have delivered us from being slaves to sin and you have given us hope and an eternal inheritance. I pray our students and teachers stand in truth and love and that school can be a place where You are loved and where neighbors love each other well. 

Cathy’s Heart for the Front Line Heroes

A hero is defined as a person who is admired or idealized for courage, outstanding achievements, or noble qualities. That is what teachers are to me. You may never realize what they go through if you aren’t one or don’t know one closely. I didn’t realize until I married a teacher, the stress, frustration, and unrealistic expectations that are placed on them every day. My husband, my brother, my sister, my grandfather, and every other teacher that loves the Lord is a front line hero to me.

What is a Front Line Hero?

As a believer when a Christian is serving in an oppressive and difficult mission field, they are considered on the “front lines”. They are serving in the undesirable areas for the sake of the Gospel. They endure discomfort, rejection, fear, and uncertainty to show God’s love to the least of these and the underserved areas.

Like Jes said above when I think of the “front line workers of faith”, I think of missionaries serving in the hardest places. But I think our perspective needs to shift some. In America and Europe, some of these “Christian” places are now becoming some of the hardest places to penetrate with the true Gospel. The Gospel still exists here, but a lot of times gets distorted by politics, mandates, or selfishness.

We need to still pray for those missionaries serving in those hard places. I do not want to negate what they are doing because it is honorable and a blessing to the Lord. But I want to broaden our idea of the “front lines” these days. Let’s exist with intentionality, seeing the spiritual war that is raging around us right where we are. If we become too complacent we will miss the battle that is ongoing in every believer’s life. And let’s start prayerfully encouraging those serving on the “front lines” right in our own neighborhoods.

The Decline

Since my husband began teaching about 10 years ago, things in the school system have been changing. Increased activity on devices, video games, and television seem to contribute to the decline. As well as the lockdowns associated with COVID-19. Something seemed to happen during that time when students were unable to go to school last year and the year before. This year the students have come back unruly and disrespectful, even at the once “nice” schools.

Jes’s husband teaches at an inner city school so he has always seen difficult things. But this year the level of rebellion and disrespect is at a whole different level. My husband does not teach at an inner city school and has also seen the decline happen in a different way in his school.

Tik Tok telling students to smack teachers and steal things from the school bathrooms, television shows encouraging “fight club” behavior in the school yard (I’m talking ELEMENTARY aged students), and “standing up for what you believe is right” is resulting in students ganging up and beating down helpless victims. This is just some of the behavior our husbands have been seeing at their schools, and I’m sure has been seen nationwide to some degree as well.

This leaves the students that want to learn and who are well behaved unable to learn because teachers struggle to control the classrooms, and their good behavior is overshadowed by the bad. And administrators can’t do much because the behavior is school wide – it’s become a culture.

What You Can Do Now

There are things we all can do NOW to help these teachers in the fight. I know it becomes hard to bear some days, just as it does for missionaries or pastors. And lies can easily creep in and take root making the teachers believe they can no longer do anything to make a difference. But we can help.

1 – PRAY – The single most important thing you can do is pray for your teachers. Maybe you have students in your home, pray for their teachers. Or maybe you know a teacher personally, pray for them. Pray collectively for every teacher that loves the Lord to be strong in their faith and every teacher that doesn’t know the Lord to come to know Him through their jobs.

Pray for the students of faith who are struggling to find who they are, how they fit in, and what they can do to make a difference. Pray for God to use them as a light in the darkness and give them boldness through His Spirit. Pray for revival in the schools. That the Holy Spirit would be moving and working even in the darkest places.

Commit to pray every Monday at 8 AM for teachers and students in the school system. This will be a collective unified prayer time for our schools.

2 – Talk to your students – If you have a student in the public school system, talk to them about what they are seeing and what is going on at school. Use this time to pray for them, encourage them, and give them practical advice. A lot of students probably feel pressured into these behaviors, and maybe talking them through will help them realize they don’t need to take part.

3 – Encourage your teachers – If you have a school aged student or know a teacher personally, have grace for them, offer them encouraging words, and maybe even gift them a small gift card or yummy treats for all they do. Sometimes teachers may come across harsh or cold to parents, but I promise it’s never anything personal. There is always some reason for why it has to be done that way, and most likely it is due to the nature of most of the students in the classroom. Give your teacher the benefit of the doubt that they are doing all they can to provide a well organized, encouraging environment for their classroom.

4 – Encourage your students to encourage their teachers – Honestly the things my husband cherishes the most are the handwritten letters from students. You know how amazing it feels to be recognized for your hard work. Teachers LOVE to hear from the students how they are learning and growing from them. My husband has some chronic health problems so he has to be out a lot or gets sick at school a lot. He always tells me of the students that show concern for him. His face lights up in thinking that someone in his classroom would even care for him.

Conclusion

Don’t forget Christian teachers and students as you pray. The school system needs them now more than ever! But it is getting so hard for some teachers that they are considering leaving teaching all together. Let’s rally around these teachers and students and lift them up in prayer and encourage them with the Word. The world needs these front line heroes.

The post The Forgotten Front Line Heroes first appeared on This Momma Needs Grace.

What is Rest with the Lord?

There’s a big difference between physical rest and spiritual rest. Constant anxiety and worry put a stress on the body that a nap or a day on the couch watching tv cannot solve. Although you may physically be able to feel better for a time, no lasting change or relief will happen. The only way to find true rest for your body and soul is to find your rest with the Lord.

The Lord provides rest in many different ways. He is always with us, providing us a safe refuge, and speaking our identities over us. He wants to be a part of everything we walk through. He understands suffering on a deeper level than we ever could, and He has empathy and compassion that can reach further into us than any person ever could. You can trust that when you seek Him, you will find rest with the Lord.

The Lord is our Refuge

When we seek the Lord, we find rest when we recognize that He is our refuge. Refuge is defined as a condition of being safe or sheltered from pursuit, danger, or trouble. The Bible talks many times about the Lord being our refuge. Meaning He is a place of safety from pursuit, danger, or trouble. So no matter what’s pursuing you – whether it’s physically or emotionally – if you can remember and believe that the Lord is your refuge, you will find rest.

Psalm 91:1-6

He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High
    will abide in the shadow of the Almighty.
I will say to the Lord, “My refuge and my fortress,
    my God, in whom I trust.”

For he will deliver you from the snare of the fowler
    and from the deadly pestilence.
He will cover you with his pinions,
    and under his wings you will find refuge;
    his faithfulness is a shield and buckler.
You will not fear the terror of the night,
     the arrow that flies by day,
nor the pestilence that stalks in darkness,
    nor the destruction that wastes at noonday.

Psalm 46:1-3

God is our refuge and strength,
    a very present help in trouble.
Therefore we will not fear though the earth gives way,
    though the mountains be moved into the heart of the sea,
though its waters roar and foam,
    though the mountains tremble at its swelling.

1 Peter 5:6-7; 10

 Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you. […]  And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you.

Psalm 23:1-3

The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.
    He makes me lie down in green pastures.
He leads me beside still waters.
    He restores my soul.
He leads me in paths of righteousness
    for his name’s sake.

Psalm 18:2

The Lord is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer,
    my God, my rock, in whom I take refuge,
    my shield, and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.

Isaiah 26:4

Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord God is an everlasting rock.

Psalm 31:1-5

In you, O Lord, do I take refuge;
    let me never be put to shame;
    in your righteousness deliver me!
Incline your ear to me;
    rescue me speedily!
Be a rock of refuge for me,
    a strong fortress to save me!

For you are my rock and my fortress;
    and for your name’s sake you lead me and guide me;
you take me out of the net they have hidden for me,
    for you are my refuge.
Into your hand I commit my spirit;
    you have redeemed me, O Lord, faithful God.

The Lord is Always With Us

Sometimes it feels like we are facing life alone. The weight and burden of it all is too much to bear crushing us under it’s weight. But when you can stop and spend time in prayer, you realize you are not alone after all. The Lord is always with you, giving you what you need. Although the circumstances around us may not be what we want, when we realize the Lord is right there fighting with us and for us we experience His supernatural peace. It is then when we find true rest with the Lord.

Matthew 28:20b

“And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.”

Psalm 118:6

The Lord is for me; I will not fear;
What can man do to me?

Colossians 1:17

He is before all things, and in Him all things hold together.

Romans 8:26-28, 31

Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.  And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. […] What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?

Matthew 1:23

“Behold, the virgin shall conceive and bear a son,
    and they shall call his name Immanuel” (which means, God with us).

1 John 4:13

By this we know that we abide in Him and He in us, because He has given us of His Spirit.

Isaiah 40:31

But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.

Isaiah 41:10

Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

The Lord Gives us Our Identities

A key I have found through my journey for finding true rest is knowing who I am in Christ. When we become believers, we receive a new identity and a new mind. When you know who you truly are in Christ, the burdens of this world seem not as heavy. Knowing who you are and all the blessings you have as a son or daughter in Christ gives you confidence in knowing you are equipped to deal with every situation and have no fear of the outcome. You walk in victory, and there you find true rest with the Lord.

2 Corinthians 5:17

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.

Galatians 4:6-7

And because you are sons, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, crying, “Abba! Father!”  So you are no longer a slave, but a son, and if a son, then an heir through God.

Colossians 3:3

For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God.

Ephesians 2:4-7

But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ—by grace you have been saved— and raised us up with him and seated us with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the coming ages he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus.

1 John 5:18

We know that everyone who has been born of God does not keep on sinning, but he who was born of God protects him, and the evil one does not touch him.

How You can Find Rest with the Lord Today

The number one way to find your rest with the Lord is to surround yourself with the Truth. Putting these Bible verses up around you help redirect your mind to where you can find your true rest. Putting down your phone and praying these Bible verses can help you find rest. Getting alone in a room or out in nature escaping the chaos of your day and sitting before the throne of Grace will give you rest.

Doing those few things will help retrain your thinking from focusing on the problems and circumstances in the world to focusing on God’s Kingdom and Promises. This is true Rest. He is true Rest. You can’t do it on your own out of your own willpower or strength. Only through His strength, Spirit, and Word will you find true rest.

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Tip #1 – Keep your Bible Handy

For me, it’s in the living room. I often find myself reading when the boys are watching a tv show in the morning. I have a routine where I get my husband’s breakfast, coffee, and lunch ready then sit and read my Bible and pray while the boys watch some morning TV. You may not be a fan of your kids watching TV, which I think is amazing!! I wish I had the patience to not need the distraction of TV to keep me sane and the boys occupied. If you are one of those awesome ones that don’t do TV, find some other activity in the mornings to keep your kids occupied. Depending on their age, it could be quiet reading time, coloring sheets, board games, playdoh, or crafts (that don’t need your help).

Whenever and wherever you decide would be the best place to do it, keep a Bible, journal, and pen there. Maybe there are a couple of rooms you’ll bounce between. Have a Bible, journal, and pen in each place. That way the resource is always there. It can also help serve as a reminder when you put it in a place you are often. Sometimes you may need to carry it around with you. Sometimes I’ll take my Bible into the kitchen while I’m getting the boys’ breakfast ready. It may not be the quietest or most ideal situation, but I am getting the Living Bread and Water so I can move forward in my day. Whatever it looks like for you, trust that ANY time you spend in God’s Word is not wasted. So even if you only get 5 minutes, it is the most worthwhile 5 minutes you’ll spend that day.

Another note – I love studying in a Study Bible. It has commentary and notes about connected verses you can look up that drives your study even deeper. My two favorite study Bibles I’ve ever had are the Quest Study Bible and Scofield Study Bible.

Tip #2 – Aim for a time but have flexibility

I like to do mine first thing in the morning (after getting the hubby off to work). I made a decision that I was going to have my quiet time before I did anything else (like get on my computer/phone/social media). Most days this happens, but (especially with kids) not every day will go as planned. Give yourself some GRACE on these days. It’s OK, if it didn’t get done right on time or by a certain schedule. Try to find time to fit it in as the day goes on. Like I said previously even 5 minutes is worth it. Maybe it’s giving up 5 minutes on Facebook while the kids nap or at school or maybe you don’t get to it until you’re about to go to sleep. It doesn’t really matter when you do it, it just matters that you are showing up and spending time with your Maker.

Tip #3 – Have accountability

This is one I’m not great about because I don’t like having accountability. Let’s be honest, how many people really love accountability?! I like to freedom to skip things and not feel guilty about it. I do say enter into this one cautiously if you are like me. The purpose of spending time with the Lord is for yours and His relationship to deepen and grow. For Him to continue to shape you to become more like Him. It is not something you should do because you feel like you “have to” or are “expected to”. If you aren’t doing it for the right reasons you probably will not get much out of it. But if you come willingly and humbly expecting to hear from the Lord, every second will be worth it.

I think if you are going to get accountability through a friend, mentor, or spouse, make sure to ask someone who will not make you feel bad if you miss a day or have a bad week. That’s not the purpose of it. It should be someone who is excited for you and what you’re learning. Someone who encourages you to get into the Word for the benefits it will provide you. Someone who will extend grace in the rough times and pray and encourage you in your current circumstances. If you are going to seek out accountability, keep these things in mind when selecting someone. It should be an encouraging source of community not a condemning source of legalism. Why does it work / why is it important? and how do you do it properly?

Tip #4 – Share with others when you get interrupted

We all know too often that when you have a family as soon as you sit down to do something, it will get interrupted. Instead of getting frustrated and losing it, try talking to your kids (or spouse) about what you are reading about. Share what God is teaching you. Then it will turn into a teaching experience for you, which help you understand on an even deeper level, and a learning experience for your kids (or spouse). We all could use more of God’s Word so it is a win-win.

Tip #5 – Journal

I love journaling. I wish I had more time to devote to it. Getting everything out on paper helps me to retain and grow even deeper in understanding. That’s one reason why I love to blog. Writing things out can bring healing, hope, restoration, understanding, and clarity. It can take those jumbled up thoughts in your head and make them finally make sense. When I journal during my quiet time, I like to write out the scripture I’m reading, any things that stand out to me, thoughts I have about the scripture, ways I think it could be applied to my every day, and prayers and praises. That is a lot! But it helps to keep it organized into blocks if you’re a more organized person. If you are more free-flowing then just start writing and you’d be amazed at what God says to you during that time!

Grab a beautiful journal like this Keepsake Journal for an even more in depth Bible study experience.

Tip #6 – Pray and meditate all day

This is one reason why I like to read in the morning. I find myself thinking back to what I read all day. This is great to keep your mind focused on the Word and how God is teaching you through it. Sometimes I only have 5 minutes to read in the morning, but by the end of the day I’ve thought on what I read most of the day and can have a significant deeper understanding. It’s really amazing to see how God can use a few minutes to help redirect your thoughts all day.

Sticky Notes!! Write down key verses or thoughts you had during your quiet time then place them around your house. At the kitchen sink, on the bathroom mirror, or a table you sit by a lot. This will keep you thinking of things, and is also great at helping you passively memorize Scripture! I had a Bible verse in the center console of my car for years, and I still have that Scripture memorized even though I’ve had a new car for 6 years now. If you’re into all things cute, here’s some of my favorite sticky notes.

Prayer is another important aspect to spending time in the Word. It’s when you can directly talk to the Lord about everything going on. I find I have the best days when I am constantly praying throughout the day. I never do it perfectly, but if I can take the time to stop and pray instead of responding out of frustrating to the kids, I am a much nicer mommy. It also helps if I continually pray about what I read that morning, asking God to reveal what it means and how I can apply it to my life. Learning how to talk to God as you go through your day will bring you more intimacy with Him which results in more peace, patience, compassion, and love.

Tip #7 – Follow a Plan

Lately I have been enjoying reading through books of the Bible. I started in Matthew and read 1-2 full chapters a day. Then depending on the day, I can either meditate and journal in the moment or I have to meditate on it as the day goes on. Some people love this approach. You can do it with any part of the Bible. I will be honest that I have tried many “reading through the Bible” plans, and it’s just not for me. I get lost in the Old Testament and end up giving up. I think if you can follow one of those plans straight through you are amazing!! I prefer to have smaller bite size pieces so I don’t feel so overwhelmed. So I usually just stick with a book at a time.

I am also a huge fan of devotionals! But I think when you’re having quiet time the bulk of learning will come directly from God’s Word. So if I have a devotional that only has a verse or two in it, I will take it a step further and read the whole chapter that verse is in. Some of my favorite devotionals are 31 Days of Praise, and 100 Days of Joy and Strength (who doesn’t love Candance Cameron Bure?!). If you’re looking for a new devotional and not sure what you’d like, read the reviews! Use Amazon, Lifeway, or Dayspring to look at what others say about it. I always like to read the best and the worst reviews and prayerfully decide from that.

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The post 7 Tips to Stay Consistent in God’s Word for Busy Moms (plus 5 free Bible reading plans) first appeared on This Momma Needs Grace.